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moody blues

it’s like this … i have all these ideas, and projects, and books to write…rooms to clean…stuff and more stuff.  and i get this wave of inspiration, or this brilliant flow of creativity.  and i’m motivated, not sleeping because the ideas won’t let me, and the hunger to create keeps me up all night, kooky on caffeine, or wakes me up early so that i am groggy and can hardly make it down the stairs without breaking a leg or squishing a cat.  and then it happens.  i get to the computer and it all leaks out of my brain.  all that good creativity, oozing out of my ears.  all that brilliance, spreading over my cushion as my head collapses onto the couch and my eyes force themselves shut.  it’s like this:


an endless climbing journey that i can never reach the top of.  that i want to conquer and say “look at me, i did it!”

although, the journey may be the best part of the whole damn mess of life; climbing this creative ladder may be more of what i need than a final product.

hmmm…not very Zen today, am i?  maybe i just need more coffee…


Can? or Can Not?


So, just as the dust is barely settling around my almost desk, since I’ve JUST moved into a new area of the department, lo and behold, the powers that be might just move me completely out of the department all together. Now, it could be someone else. Not exactly cut-backs…several people in the division I work in will be “relocating” to other areas of the system. At least one – if not two – from my section. Because I am low man on the totem pole, I assume this will be me. And, while I am duly frustrated at the idea of moving yet again, for what might be fifth time in about a year and ½, I am hopeful that if I do move I will go to an area where I already have friends, and I have already worked there before.

But seriously, give a girl a rest! It feels like every day I come to work I have to check to make sure I still have a mailbox and can still get into the building! Oy! Keep me or Can me already!

(keep me)