Category Archives: crabby panties

two cents

i’m in America; the elections are over, and after arguments, debates and ballots have been cast, i still feel the wake of it all.    i’ve read a lot of comments on gay issues on people’s ‘social media’ sites recently – twitter, facebook, etc.  – as well as doom and gloom from people who are unhappy about the outcome of the election.  i feel the need to press my two cents into cyber space, for some reason i can never explain.

this is mostly about gay issues, prompted by conversations and opinions from various people on a friend’s wall;

i am a liberal Democrat, if you must know, and voted accordingly.  i support same sex marriage, as well as a woman’s right to choose abortion.  having said that, i also support opposite sex marriage, and a woman’s right to choose NOT to abort.

America isn’t about homosexuality, or religion, or health care for everyone, or abortion.  America is about FREEDOM.

a few years back i stopped going to a restaurant i consider to have excellent quality foods and service, and completely delicious dishes.  why?  well the owners are Christians. but that isn’t WHY.  i stopped going because the owners blatantly promote their religion.  there is a huge electric sign that stands in front of the restaurant glaring at me and quoting me Bible verses that are supposed to make me want to convert or confess.  there are Bible verses on the menu, and a cardboard box on the counter for prayer requests.

i don’t have anything against all of these things in particular; praying for others is awesome, and having a guideline to follow in life is both helpful and respectable.   i DO have a problem with trying to come in for a meal and being bombarded with someone else’s religious leanings.  if i wanted to get a good dose of guilting i could go to church; what i really want is the big summer salad with extra cheese and nuts, and a side of that Amish bread please.

but all this is true on the OTHER side of the coin.  if i go into a coffee shop for a latte, i want a latte.  i don’t want someone to shove their views of gay marriage down my throat.  i am FOR gay marriage, but the appropriate place for this kind of discussion is NOT in a coffee shop through signs, or clothing messages, or cupcakes named after famous gay people.

i’d like to see things swing back to center slightly.  i’d like for people to remember what respect and freedom are about.  my right to support gay marriage is as equal as someone else’s right to OPPOSE gay marriage.  my decision to be a liberal is no better than someone else’s decision to be conservative.  we should have the FREEDOM to choose certain things in our lifetimes, but that necessitates that others have the SAME freedom to choose oppositely.  we all just need to grow up, stop name calling, and accept the fact that we will always have differing opinions; that is what makes us great; that is what makes us interesting; and the freedom to have these differing opinions is far more important than what the actual opinions boil down to.

 

grrr football

well it’s thursday, and there’s a football game tonight.  so what will happen?  will referees be attacked by angry men in sweatshirts?  will indecision and lack of communication decide another win for a team that maybe didn’t really do what they got credit for?  (sorry Seattle, you know i love you).   or will fans start to boycott this mess and leave the multi-million dollar stands completely empty, like an old Roman arena that once was great and full of competition, but then someone decided, “hmmmm…feeding random people to lions is just really droll.  let’s have them fight to the death instead!”

it’s not like i’m going to say anything that hasn’t already been said continually for the last 72 hours straight.  but i’m going to say it anyway, because this is my blog and i can do that.

GET THIS SHIT FIGURED OUT, NFL.

this is ridiculous.  maybe the NFL proper is all about money, and making more of it, and profits, and money and cash.  but WHERE do they think all that money comes from?  SURPRISE, IDIOTS!  THE FANS!  if the fans, and the commentators, and the experts, analysts, reporters, players, coaches, and medics are all angry and upset about a situation, i’m thinking you need to address that situation.

am i crazy here?  (don’t answer that, we already know that answer)   yes you may have the almighty dollar as your bottom line, but you won’t be getting those magical monies if you piss off everyone that has said dollars in their pockets.

GET YOUR HEADS OUT OF YOUR ASSES AND BRING BACK THE REGULAR OFFICIALS.  how many people have to say it to make it enter your fat skulls?

socks of gloom

i’m wearing my fun socks today, but it doesn’t seem to be making its impact.  if any of you have watched the TV series BONES, you know that FBI agent Sealy Booth wears funky socks as his way of being unique and special in a world of hum-drumminess.  his way of ‘sticking it to the man’, i guess.  or his way of declaring his individualism.  and if you watch Storage Wars, you know that Barry (I LOVE YOU BARRY!) wears his ‘lucky’ socks, hopefully to have blessings from the picking gods.

but for me, the magical, stripey, Monster High socks that i am wearing are not bringing me the anticipated magical stripey day.  despite their cuteness, and their roller-derbiness, my customers are still yelling at me, demanding, and pushy.  i’ve heard bad news today, like about the girl that has been missing for 8 days, or the man that was dead for 2 years without anyone noticing.

boo.

tomorrow i’m coming in barefoot.

 

nervous breakdown #673

well dang.  gave myself a minor breakdown today.

i sometimes wonder why i put up weird pictures on here, because i might like it, but really – not everyone has the same taste.  and i am well aware that i am on the “outer limits” of the norm, not only for my ‘condition’ but also for my taste, style, aesthetic…and humor.  oh, and outlook.  but i put up pictures none the less.  and Accidental Happiness # something or other- i’m glad i have!  i’ve started saving some of my pics on a new jump drive, cause i’m trying to get them organized.  there are some shots i deem “cooler” than others, and want to make prints of, to maybe sell at local shops in my area.  and FUCK IT if my brand new drive full of pictures didn’t say “corrupted” today when i slid it into it’s little home.  WTF???   i completely freaked out, then did the melting down thing, then cried.  lots of hours of work, and lots of anticipation fucked all over the globe.  but i did a little research and found that i’d squirreled away many of the pictures i wanted; on other drives, here, and on my facebook account.  (thank you facebook!)   i suppose now i should make hard copies as well as do the whole shutterfly and/or flickr thing, which i just keep putting off.

some pix i can’t find.  and i guess either i don’t need them, or they don’t want to be found, or i need to go make new ones.  but what a panic!  and i’m glad to have found the majority in other little places.  so, accidental happiness: 80% of pix recovered.  word to the wise: don’t skimp on jump drives and get the cheap ass ones on sale for 3.99 in a big barrel/bin at whatever office supply store is unloading them.  major suckage.

Dorito Choke-hold

so today my “fortune cookie” (Facebook app) says:  “Physical activity will improve your outlook”.  i’m thinking, “ok, ok, i need to work out” then popped a few more Doritos in my mouth.  mmm, “Jacked Enchilada Supreme”  whoa!!

well lo and behold, one of these darlings gets lodged in my throat, and i start pulling a George Bush, choking on my snack food!  gack!  i mean, this is hours later, after i’ve read the fortune cookie, but i’m choking, and my eyes are leaking like i’ve just seen a re-run of the Titanic (it upset me a great deal that all those people drowned) and there’s no one else here but me, and i can’t BREATHE!!  i seriously couldn’t even get air to go into my body because my windpipe was blocked.  i got pretty nervous!

and then after i calmed myself down and rearranged my throat (we call it “Roller Coaster”; you put your arms up over your head and somehow this opens up your pathway – works EVERY time i’m dying of Dorito) well i started feeling pretty good!

ok i looked like shit.  but the dark circles around my eyes are from something else, like staying up all night to finish reading the Hunger Games ending, Mockingjay.  but the crying face and red blotchy skin was definitely from Dorito choke hold.

thing is, i’ve been really grumpy lately.  or despondent may be a better word.  i have Multiple Personality Disorder, for those of you that don’t know, and while this makes life very interesting and somewhat humorous, i also get frustrated that i can’t seem to get anything done.  like housework.  or my writing projects.  because i will WANT to work on something – like working off my 15 winter pounds – but someone else in there would rather watch TV, make jewelry, or color.  so my projects take … well a little bit of a flexible time plan.  so i’ve been irritated at me, at my slow paced direction in life, and at situations like work.  i’ve been poopy britches and whiny…

and today, after the exciting adrenaline rush i had almost dying, well the world looks a little brighter.  thanks for showing me how to change my attitude, Mr. ex-President Bush.  (even though i didn’t vote for you and this wouldn’t make me change my mind, but thanks)

 

blues

i don’t want to go to work today.  it’s beautiful out: rainy, foggy, green grass greener than the crayon in my box.  the wind is blowing, but it’s still warm enough to have the windows open.

this is a day for writing, and imagination.  this is a day for creativity, inspiration, and a long nap with a kitty and a mushed up pillow.  this isn’t a day to be indoors with grumpy patrons and testy people who only want you for an ear to bend about their list of life long problems.  this isn’t a day for weird people who alter your energy because they are from another galaxy far away and have been sent here to warn the earth about impending doom because we haven’t been drinking the right kind of water.

this is a snuggly day, for peace and relaxation and … snuggling.  not work.

damn i hate mondays.

 

good golly

[begin sarcastic tone]

the charger on my laptop recently went kaput.  so until i get my new one in the mail, the massively exciting posts i’ve been writing so frequently, the scintillating pictures i’ve been posting and the thrilling tales of adventure, espionage and gossip will be on hold.

i know it’s hard to control yourself.  it’s ok if you cry a little.  i’ll be back soon.

[/endsarcastic tone] 

 

not gone, just flued up

i have missed blogging, and boring you all to tears with my bits and pieces of absurdity.  but i’ve had the flu for a week, and just haven’t had much energy.  plus i could hardly walk for the stomach pain, so blogging hasn’t been much on my mind.  well that’s not true, it’s been on my mind, but not a feasible thing.  so, i am sort of back on, but slow in getting my creative brain moving.

the devil inside

we all have a little of the dark in us i guess.  last night while i was lying on my heated massage table, my next door neighbor was outside in his car, playing ‘tunes’.  he does this all the time.  perhaps he’s gotten into a fight with his wife, so he goes into the car and blares his music.  maybe he’s in there getting high, as he frequently does.  maybe he’s just trying to pop the eardrums of unsuspecting locals.  the boom boom of his choice of music echoes through his vehicle loudly enough that it shakes the windows of my house.

it’s kind of hard to be in a peaceful, restful state when it sounds like a sledge hammer is taking down your walls.

at about this point last night the dark in me rose up.  i lay on the massage table imagining ways that i could kill my neighbor; electrical shock from his own stereo would be the most poetic, but probably not an easy task to arrange.  if i were a vampire i could drink him dry, but i don’t think i’d want to get that close to him, he’s been kind of sour lately.

at first this kind of thinking made me feel uncomfortably wrong.  we are taught that good girls don’t do those kind of things, and that thinking a bad thought is as bad as doing it.  but eventually i just accepted the fact that i was pissed, and irritated that he is so continuously rude (this family also forgets that their car stereo is on “blast” when they start it at 5 am with the auto starter, and leave it running for ten minutes).  despite the reality that i’ve been trained to squish away these kind of thoughts, or that sending negative vibes to another will bring bad to me threefold, it seemed to make me feel better.  imagining him injured didn’t help, but ALLOWING myself to imagine, and then ACCEPTING and ACKNOWLEDGING these thoughts and feelings released my tension and anxiety.

and then, his music stopped.

life is maybe less about trying to make things happen, and make the right decisions, and more about going with the flow and admitting that you are still a little beast here and there.

children’s song goes PG-13

you know that old song “If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands.  If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands.  If you’re happy and you know it, then you’re face will really show it…lalalalalala”

i’m trying to think what that song would sound like if you’re an old, tired, grumpy, jaded person who doesn’t have the energy to clap or smile, and is really looking forward to something more like falling down in a dead drunk sleep and drooling all over the pillow while simultaneously avoiding alcohol poisoning by a hair. 

haven’t quite come up with it yet, but i’ll let you know.