Minor Rebellion ~ THE DARK LORD
I once had a conversation with someone about creationism versus evolution. We were friends, and a group of us got into this discussion, about how God created the world and everything in the extended universes in one week. And how evolution was a made up theory to disprove God. But my question was: we don’t know for sure that God didn’t CREATE evolution. What if he wound the clock and set things in motion – sure in your one week – and then let things evolve from there. Why can’t BOTH realities be reality. This caused quite a stir in my group, for it was a group of Christian friends, and I quickly became aware of what time it was and a forgotten hair appointment I suddenly needed to keep.
But what I didn’t argue with them about was my secret opinion that God didn’t actually create EVERYTHING in existence. Sorry, everyone is entitled to their own opinions, and this is mine:
There are some things that I definitely attribute to Satan, and a few that can be found on the list are as follows:
- Zits in weird places. OK, maybe God invented zits – for some sort of weird, ugly, painful purification process. But zits in the EAR? Definitely a design of Satan
- Any city in the world that is without a Taco Bell or Jimmy John’s. These are favorite locations of Old Scratch and possibly demon controlled by the under lord himself, or one of his many minions
- Hyenas. Do I really need to go into this? Scarrrry!
- LOTTO tickets that have your winning numbers inverted, like a winning “24” instead of your chosen and meaningful 42, which represents the number of times you have broken a small appliance when you got a mixed up LOTTO ticket. I guess maybe if God was having a bad week this could be attributed to Him as some practical joke, but usually this kind of thing is straight out of the think tank in Hell
- Facebook’s add column. This is way too creepy to be from God. As soon as you search anything on the net, you suddenly have 75% off adds from THESE VERY PLACES, listed right there on the side of your very admirable trouncing of other competitors who think they can beat you in Candy Crush Saga
other Satanic creations will follow eventually…
Posted on April 17, 2013, in minor rebellion and tagged advertisements, Candy Crush Saga, creationism, debates, evolution, Facebook, humor, lottery tickets, LOTTO, Satan, taco bell. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.